Merry Christmas in a divorce.

As this year winds to a close, I am facing my first Christmas without my boys.  It would have been so easy to let the grief overtake me and spend the days ahead feeling sorry for myself, and to be truthful, that is very nearly where my holiday season went.  But instead of being consumed by bitterness and spending the days and nights in front of the TV with a keg of Malbec, I decided to embrace the unique opportunities this situation was going to afford me.  Seeing as it was going to take a direct intervention from God to change things, and He tends to prefer to work more behind the scenes, even at Christmas, I offered to work right through the holidays so I could give other people a chance to spend time with their loved ones while mine were so far away.  This plan will have the added bonus of saving me money on wine, and it's not like I could use the time to get caught up on anything out side the house.  Once I made the decision a huge weight just disappeared from my heart.  My boys just weren't going to be with me on the 25th of December.  And somehow, I didn't die with that moment of clarity.  Because of that choice, I get to celebrate Christmas with friends this year.  I'll still be surrounded by kids and people I care about, just not mine, I'll still get to eat what is sure to be a fantastic Christmas feast, I just don't have to cook it all.  This year I get to try a traditional vegan smorgasbord.  I'm sure it's going to be delicious.  I offered to try and prepare a vegan dish to contribute to the meal, but was politely turned down.  Most likely due to concern over my skill with that particular food preparation discipline.  This year will also mark my first ever visit to a store on Boxing Day.  I've managed to studiously avoid that rite of passage for my whole life because I needed to have everything done before Christmas eve.  This year, I get to try and save a bit by buying the bigger gifts on Boxing Day.  I suspect I'll need more than a bit of luck and a mountain of patience, neither of which I've ever had an abundance of in my life.  Perhaps I will buy some wine, just in case.  So here it is, Christmas Eve and I'm sitting in the mall, manning the kiosk, ostensibly being a Realtor, but mostly giving out directions, wearing shiny gold pants that I'm told make me look like a Christmas ornament because I've got carolling to go to afterwards, eating chocolate and donuts.  Not such a bad way to spend the night before Christmas.  Later I'll make sure to take pictures to send to my guys so I can show them Santa didn't forget them.  My little one is already questioning whether he's real or not, because he didn't get what he asked for.  But it's the same thing denied countless other kids before him, his family back.  I don't know what the new year will hold for us, but we've managed so far and when I get my boys back, they're going to get hugged so tight.  Merry Christmas!

Fall Family Fun Fair, 2013

     We are finally settled into a new school year, past the first round of sick bugs and Thanksgiving is just around the corner.  The days are getting shorter as the clock winds us ever closer to the holiday hub bub.  This year, we got to kick off fall with a bang by hosting the first ever annual Fall Family Fun Fair at our church.  What a great time we had planning, organizing and pulling off what turned out to be a truly successful event.  In my old life, BC, (Before Children), I was promoter and event planner, so this was an opportunity to dust off my old skill set and use them on something other than an insanely elaborate, themed birthday party for my kiddies.
As an added bonus, I got to utilize Pinetrest.  I have a love/hate relationship with the site.  As anyone who knows me can attest, I have a multitude of boards covering every conceivable topic and am constantly looking for great ideas to add to them.  It used to be that I was the one that threw the best parties because I was the one with the best ideas and I guarded them jealously.  The recipes, the decorating, the projects, the themes.  They were mine and if you wanted access to them it cost you.       Thanks to Pinterest, all that is over.  Anyone can plan a great event, with a minimum amount of time.  It's not all bad though.  I have a great new career in real estate and I can use my old skills for charitable events and fun, with much less stress.  I'm a little new to working cooperatively, when you're working with friends and volunteers, it's very important to be inclusive and polite, I've learned.  No paycheck means people are less likely to tolerate even a benevolent dictatorship.
Our lovely group of volunteers from Providence Community Church put together an amazing list of super fun activities for the families in Oak Bay to participate in.  We had pumpkin bowling, ring toss, an obstacle course, mask making, beading, face painting, clay creations.  Our big crowd pleasers were the Imagination Station, I was completely stunned and amazed by what the kids built out of blocks of wood, buttons, string, feathers, marbles and glue guns, The "Make Your Own Caramel Apple Bar", where kids got to dip a granny smith apples in a home made caramel dip and cover them in their choice of toppings, raging from mini marshmallows to gummy bears and everything in between.  Outside we had a "Haystack Candy scramble for kids to dig through for prizes, under a huge tent of course because this is Victoria.  Add to all that hot dogs and tons of baked goodies all donated to help raise money to send kids to school in Uganda.
    

Local Oak Bay businesses also donated a great array of prizes to be won by attendees.  It was a great way to introduce our selves to our neighbours, and in turn introduce them to a wonderful cause worth supporting in one of the most needed areas of our world.  Next year, hopefully, we'll get a little more cooperation from the Big Guy, and not have to implement a rain plan, but even if the weather is worse next year, we'll still have the inside of the Monterey Center, just in case.
Providence Community Church meets every Sunday at 1442 Monterey ave, Oak Bay, Victoria, at 10 am.  Everyone is welcome and we have a coffee meet and greet afterwards.  There are also lots of special events all year long.  For more information check out the website:   www.providencecommunitychurch.com

The days grow longer as we wind our way through spring and life gets busier and brighter, with play dates and picnics and long evenings spent outside with friends and neighbours.  It gets harder and harder to get the kids inside and to bed, harder and harder to get them to sleep in through the sunlit mornings.  We are racing around the city trying to fit in all the fun, to be the super mom we all love to be, meeting the needs of my clients, trying to remember to meet a few of my own needs against the looming deadline of summer.  It must be a hold over from our childhoods, waiting for the promise filled days of summer vacation to arrive.  The first niggling of excitement starts as May blooms and Mother's day breaks.  I got to enjoy a day as close to perfect as I could expect.  Sunday morning breakfast of home made waffles topped with the first crops of local strawberries and tons of whipped cream.  Then a wonderful trip to church to meet the newest family member, an adorable bundle of energy from Siberia, now at his new home here Victoria.  We spent a lovely afternoon at the pool playing, swimming and splashing and then made food to share with our neighbours.  It turned out I forgot to put onions in my ham and mixed bean soup, but that wasn't the important part of the day anyways.  My so sweet baby boy insisted on getting me a beautiful amber and sterling silver ring because he saw a commercial on TV about showing mom how much you love how much she does for you with diamonds.  Of course it sure helped that they were referred to as "candy diamonds".  What a brilliant marketing plan.  I'm betting that dad was grateful 4 year olds don't really know what diamonds are!  It was still the sweetest gift I've ever gotten.
Since that wonderful day, I've juggled working 10 and 12 hour days trying to find the perfect home for my wonderful clients with my beautiful baby boy's crazy hectic schedule of school, gymnastics, baseball and friends.  I'm looking at tomorrow, the traditional start of summer, the May long weekend, exhausted, with a heart filled with peace, love and joy.  I can sense a real turning point in the future.  The Real estate market here in Victoria appears to have picked up almost over night and I love being a part of it.  I don't know if it really is God I am feeling as  the sun shines down on my skin or if it's just the warm blush from a glass of wine on the patio after work, but it sure feels good.  then again it could just be that I'm just too tired to care about anything anymore.  Whatever it is, I'll take it.  Especially after the last 9 months!

Happy April Fools Day Victoria!  I hope everyone had as wonderful a long weekend as I had with my family.  So much sunshine and so many fun activities to participate in.  Good Friday saw us attending the city wide, multi-congregational service held at the Pearkes Recreational Center with over 2000 others of all ages for a start to the Easter celebrations.  It was our first year to attend and it was a great example of the great community we live in here. 
Saturday morning meant the 7th annual Community Easter Egg Hunt at Windsor Park in Oak Bay put on by Providence Community Church.  This event gets better and better every year, with coffee and goodies for the grown ups and an indoor area for shelter that obviously wasn't needed this year.  It took less than 5 minutes for the kids to scoop up the thousands of candy filled eggs!  It truly is a sight to see.
Sunday we were at the Lighthouse Church service and community dinner.  It was a full house and we served mountains of salads, pounds of potatoes, 8 hams, 3 turkeys, and a multitude of assorted sides and desserts to friends and neighbours.  It was heartening to see so many people come out and participate.  It's an uncommon find, a young, vibrant congregation dedicated to community service and an approachable and fun Pastor who reach just about anyone with honesty and humour.
The last day of our long week end brings us to April Fool's Day, with 2 mischievous little boys sneaking cayenne pepper into breakfast, much to every one's surprise.  Another day full of sunshine, and a ton of housework as family departs and a bit of light reading to brush up on the return to GST/PST and the transitional tax.  Now that it's here, do you know how it's going to affect you and your family in their purchases in the coming year and beyond?  Click on the link below for a fairly extensive and relatively easy to understand list of changes.  There is also additional, housing specific information available on my website:  www.angeliquetroyer.ca 
What's taxable, what's not?